Motto: Don't Fall Down!

This is funny.  I started this on 8/23, right after the fall I just explained about in my last post!  I just kept it as a draft.  Ha!  That is definitely the MS talking! Enjoy the beginning of the first message about my fall:




Yes, this is one of my many mottos, and I did not live by it the other day, although I do contest that this fall had nothing to do with MS.  I was on my daily walk through the neighboring woods to a part of the creek that also runs behind our property.  There is a new little bridge there, heavy duty enough for traffic, but on our neighbor's private property.  I try to walk this every day for several reasons.  First, it is beautiful and calming.  Second, it is not a difficult walk, but it does get my body up and moving.  I believe that is important for all of us, regardless of mental, physical or medical reason.  Third, because it is new and beautiful and can also be seen from the passing road, trespassers tend to like stopping by with motor bikes, quads, sometimes hunting equipment, and garbage, which they graciously leave behind.  

Well, the way this bridge was put up, it rises several feet above the creek (which, bu the way, is just a trickle of water but otherwise mostly dry during this time of year).  They had to build the trail up quite a way to get to where the bridge was sitting so they could clear around and make a road.  At any rate, either side of the bridge has rock covered with grass that now grows out of the hay and grass-seed mixture they sprayed all over the rock.

Background of my story complete!  I walked to the other side of the bridge, with the idea that I would walk down the grassy slope and up the other side to a little trail that leads to a campground of sorts.  Instead, I took one step off the gravel road onto a somewhat grass-covered, fairly smooth and round, large rock.  It turned and somehow 

Post Traumatic Fall Syndrome

I know.  It has been a long time since my last post. I had a fall a while back, and although it was not MS related, I have had a lot of trouble since!  

I was out doing my daily walk through some of the neighboring property and on a decline, a rock turned under my foot and I was unable to keep myself from falling.  Good for me, I was able to turn in such a way that I did not tumble down the incline.  Not so good for me, I landed squarely - tail bone to solid rock.  Sitting for long amounts of time, standing for any time, even lying down in one position for very long, is painful.  I have not gone to the doctor because even if my tail bone is broken (I am starting to believe it is at least cracked) what would they do?  They're not going to give me a cast or a sling...!  So, each night I sit on (or kind of recline on) an ice pack and hope the pain goes down a little.

For the first few days, I figured I had just bruised it.  A bone bruise can be very painful... even more painful than a broken bone, sometimes. This has been almost two weeks and it has been getting worse.  Of course, I did move a queen box spring and mattress... twice.  I never knew the muscles I used to move things...  ;-)

Well, I know you didn't come to read about my posterior issues, but about my MS.  Unfortunately, except for ranting about how tired the pain has made me, my posterior is really the only thing on my mind... (For those of you with a more literal understanding of the world... I am happy to report that my rear end is not currently actually on my head!)

At any rate, more on MS next post.

Is It My MS, or Is It Me??

I went to a presentation the other day with the above title.  It turned out to be a basic introduction to MS, mainly focusing on people who are not longtime members of the MS family, and everyone attending had been diagnosed anywhere from several years ago to several decades ago.  I must say the most amazing thing about people with MS.  We can talk about ANYTHING once we become acclimated to our own MS.  The "Ambassador" who came to talk to us spent most of her time talking about catheterizing.  Lovely thought for anyone, and not something people would normally talk about to strangers!  Still, there we were, listening to her, and then we began comparing our own experiences with diagnosis.  It was really a loss to me to have the main presenter show up because I think that we MSers would have really enjoyed sharing our stories with each other.  One person didn't even get to share her diagnosis story because the presenter came in and we were basically told to listen to him.  Not in a bad or rude way, of course, but to "get the ball rolling" with the show, as it were.

I don't have much contact with others with MS.  I live outside a small town, and even the closest "support group" is almost an hour away.  I am usually too tired or too distracted to remember to go, and truthfully, there is not a lot of time for just two or three of us to talk.  If I don't "click" with someone pretty much right off, I am less likely to engage.  My brain wanders.

The people at the program all seemed to click with me.  One even emailed me later.  You see, I am making a cookbook this year for my Walk MS team, and she emailed just to say hi and to let me know she would be sending some recipes.  I thought that was nice.

So when do we ask ourselves if something we experience is MS or just us?  I say we have to learn about our own very special MS.  Each one of us has an MS that no one else has. It is ours.  It is not who we are, or what we do, and I do not say I "survive" it or "struggle" with it.  I have MS.  The weeds grow in my yard. These are facts that hold no particular weight over me.  But I have learned (and continue to learn) the difference between pain that is CAUSED by my MS, pain that is RELATED to my MS, and pain that is just normal for anyone who, say, twists his ankle or burns her finger.  Does my eyesight fail because of MS, or because of age?  My eyesight is not as good when I am fatigued and the fatigue is part of my MS, but if I get enough rest (and don't rely on my readers, but exercise my eyes), my vision is still 20/20.

One suggestion I would make to anyone who has been diagnosed with MS, whether last week or last decade... get a cognitive evaluation done if you can.  I had one, and I have discovered that more and more doctors are suggesting it, more and more weight is put on it if you need to get on SSDI later, and even though I am on SSDI, I have a wonderful baseline cognitive report that helps me to understand and to explain to others why I am no longer as good at some things as I used to be.

So is it me, or my MS?  Is it you or your MS?  Your doctor may be able to point you in the right direction, but only you really have the answer.